Trying To Get Off The Optimism Train

In which optimism turns out to be really hard work but doesn’t have an off switch. I think that like many things from gender to the bitterness of chocolate, optimism and pessimism are places on a scale. If there were a Kinsey scale for optimism/pessimism I would be at the TOTALLY GAY end of it. … Continue reading Trying To Get Off The Optimism Train

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Speaking of Spoons

In which I talk of many things, of shoes and ships and sealing wax and cabbages and kings. No, wait, spoons. Just spoons. A spoon is a simple thing: a small bowl on the end of a handle. But in the last few years the word has come to mean much more than that. It … Continue reading Speaking of Spoons

I’m Back – And I’m Tired!

In which I ramble about the last three months (nearly). It doesn’t seem like such a long time not to be posting, but it’s been strangely hard to get back into writing here. So in this post I’m not talking about any topic in particular, but just making a summary of what’s been going on … Continue reading I’m Back – And I’m Tired!

Self-Care Is What We Need It To Be

Self-care! Which of us hasn’t been infuriated on stumbling across yet another article advocating bubble baths and walks in nature? Self-care is a big old trend at the moment and that is an excellent thing. It isn’t enough, of course. We also need a societal structure that supports people to care for themselves properly. The … Continue reading Self-Care Is What We Need It To Be

When You Call Me Strong, Who Do You Think Is Weak?

People tell me I’m strong all the time and it always bothered me in that small squirmy way where you aren't quite sure why you dislike the thing, just that you do. Here, I’ve finally thought my way through the problem and discovered that there are a few reasons I am uncomfortable with being called … Continue reading When You Call Me Strong, Who Do You Think Is Weak?

Living With ME: Despair

Life has been hard recently. It’s hard to say how long for, really. At the outside, I could say life has been hard since I was about ten and discovered the fickleness of friendship for the first time. It’s never been the same since. But, for the purposes of today, the last few months have … Continue reading Living With ME: Despair

The Prevention of ME/CFS?

ME/CFS can’t be prevented, we all know that. But do we? Certainly it isn’t something that medical professionals talk about, or ME/CFS advocacy and patient support groups, and equally certainly there is no proven method of prevention. I, personally, don’t believe that that means it isn’t possible. I think that we can protect ourselves, at … Continue reading The Prevention of ME/CFS?

Surviving Winter

Winter. It’s always been a question of survival. And in some ways, human beings are at a disadvantage: we can’t hibernate, we don’t grow thicker fur and most of us can’t afford to migrate. However, we make up for it with our big old brains. Winter is the reason we have fermented, canned, dried, smoked … Continue reading Surviving Winter

10 Ways You Can Help A Mentally Ill Friend

1. Listen To listen, with nothing more attached, is a powerful help. How often you do feel really listened to? Just let your friend talk. Make it clear they have your full attention: put your phone away, allow them to make eye contact with you, and give verbal and non-verbal feedback. Don’t be afraid of … Continue reading 10 Ways You Can Help A Mentally Ill Friend

It’s Okay To Not Forgive

“Forgive and forget” is a maxim that will be familiar to nearly everyone who has grown up in an English-speaking country. After all, the English-speaking countries are historically Christian and forgiveness is one of the central rules of Christianity. In fact, both Christianity and modern culture have a huge culture of forgiveness, and this is … Continue reading It’s Okay To Not Forgive